The Search

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Fujifilm X100F

I have been driving myself and Jane mad for the last few weeks, its that time in my life that many of us look forward to but its is scary as hell ! Retirement ! What does it even mean, well I think I am searching for the answer. I know what I want to do from 2022 onwards its just the next four years that are driving me nuts.

I plan to Semi Retire in October 2018 but that has taken its toll on my thought pattern, so much so that I have not been sleeping and every day I feel this massive pull to go out and find great light and photograph people but at the same time I need to finish planning and also get all the work done that needs doing with Fujiholics and my own company.

I have been searching for the answers to a million questions in my head about the future and how to say NO ! But I find it hard  to get the balance right ! Not quite as easy as I thought it would be. I think its trying to slow the creative productive brain down and make it change direction. I guess its like slamming the breaks on whilst on black ice, you just don’t know where you might end up.

I do have a plan but at the moment I am spinning on black ice searching for grip.

I spend most weeks trying to pull other photographers out of a dip in mojo or loss of inspiration and this is a little like that but more information overload.

The image above I think was me regaining grip and starting to get myself back on track, as the guy came in to view and I read what it said on his bag and I set up the shot I had a massive grin on my face. I guess I am  Searching for incredible in my work at all times and searching always for answers. Its what I think we strive for as Professional Photographers but sometimes never find.

The most important thing about today was the simple fact I was out making photographs and enjoying it again and that has been so rare over the last few years so seeing this bag and smiling was just the traction I needed to steer me in the right direction.

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Fujifilm X100F
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Fujifilm X100F
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Fujifilm X100F

One thought on “The Search

    Keith Goldstein said:
    July 27, 2018 at 5:31 pm

    Nice Matt! I wish I could retire!

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