Wow its March 2020 already and it’s been very very wet for quite a while now.
My recovery has been a slow process but I am getting used to working around the brain damage.
I have let Photography take a back seat for a while and I have slowed down with YouTube until I can sort out why I can’t monetize the account. Not that it matters but I dont what to throw hundreds of hours at it and find out in 5 years time the account has other issues ! If only you could speak to a Human at Google or Adsense !!
I have been working on both of my 365 Project on Instagram so if you want to check them out its @matt6t6 on Insta.
The Path project is now running at the same time as my weather project, both projects are shot on my iphone11ProMax and images edited in instagram only. The Path Project shots are all Square and the Weather projects are all low Horizon shots in 4:3 format.
I am getting a huge amount of enjoyment out of just using my phone and will get back to photography when I am ready. I have some plans for Youtube as well and hopefully will get back to youtube in late 2020.
I have never had the time to do a 365 and working as a Professional Photographer I was far to busy with my work so the last thing I wanted to do was pick up a camera once more every day and take or remember to take one more photo !
I was trying to think of a project to do this year and after taking a few photos on my Dog walks Matt Walkley Suggested I do a Path Project and from there I have decided to do my first ever 365 project.
So my 2020 365 Project will be pathways, it will be shot on my iphone 11 pro max and in black and white.
You will be able to follow along on my instagram account @matt6t6 I did think about starting a new Insta for the project but I am trying to reduce my social media not add to it !
I have always thought a 365 would drive me nuts so I am about to find out.
One thing is for sure this time next year I will have taken a lot of images of Paths !!!
It’s not a very nice photo but it shows where I was on February the 14th 2019, that’s right my Valentines present was a Carotid Endarterectomy !
I will just say before I start this Blog I owe the NHS my life and even though there were a few errors I have had a complicated couple of years medically here is the short version on YouTube if you don’t want to read this. YouTube Version.
First I need to go back a couple of years to the start.
In my late 30s I had a bad motorcycle accident and broke my back. I was told at the time I would never walk again but after a while I got the feeling back in my legs and started a long painful recovery. I have suffered with back problems from that day. At the time of the accident they found out I had a very narrow spinal canal and this would cause me issues with pain as the nerves had nowhere to go when compressed by my discs.
Jump forward to approx two years ago and I started getting very bad back pains and I was losing feeling in my legs and having severe pain in my hips knees and ankles. I went to the doctors and he sent me for an MRI. The results were I had 5 disc bulges in to a narrow spinal canal !! At the time he said he could only operate on the worst one L3 but this might not help. I was put on heavy pain meds but I am not one for lots of meds as that’s just a slippery slope. So decided to lose some weight and start Physio.
I worked hard with the Physio and I went from 106.9 Kilos down to 80 Kilos in about 6 Months. I thought I had done very well I was pain free and had no back problems whatsoever. But then after a meal in Edinburgh I had excruciating pain under my right rib cage and up my back, pain like I have never had before I was sick and my urine went bright orange. Turns out losing weight can cause Gallstones !!! You can’t make it up can you all that hard work and now a new type of pain.
Gallstone pain is excruciating so it was back on the pain meds but this time they did not help much as the only thing that helped with Gallstone pain was walking until it subsided ! I walked miles and miles in agony around the house and around the streets, even when we were away or at friends it would start and I would have to walk until it stopped or I was exhausted.
They wanted to list me for Surgery but first they wanted to stick a camera down to make sure there were no other issues and it was safe to take the gallbladder out. I went for the camera and have had this procedure before but this time the sedative was not as good and it was a very painful and uncomfortable experience. When I came out that sat Jane and I down and told me I had esophagus cancer or the precursor to it and had sent the biopsies off for testing ! (All you here is cancer ) I was crapping myself for two weeks and even lost some more weight. Lucky for me the biopsies came back negative.
Following the Camera however, I was not in a good way I was having small electric shocks all down my left side and in my mouth and on my face and head these were accompanied by massive headaches and shooting white lights in my eyes a bit like you get when you stand up to quick or get a knock on the head. My doctor was convinced it was nothing to do with the camera procedure but I was not. He told me it was migraines and would probably go.
During all this I was in Birmingham with my friend Matt Walkley and Lee Glasgow and we were drinking a lot of Single Malt but I will come back to this night.
In the end I was not happy with my Doctor and went to see a diferent doctor who was concerned and booked me and MRI this MRI was not even in 2018 it was August 2019 ! The day after I went to see the Doctor I went blind in my right eye, it was like and opaque curtain across the bottom of my eye. So I went back in to the Doctors and she sent me to St Pauls Eye Hospital in Liverpool !
Trust me the whole world is in that waiting area with itchy eyes !! I waited about 6 hours and by the time I was seen I could see again. They did a quick eye exam and told me it was probably a little TIA behind the eye but was clear now but if it happens again to come back asap. The checked with A&E and let me go. The following day I went blind again twice the first time for a few seconds the next time longer so I jumped in a Cab and went back to the Hospital as instructed. I wanted 4 hours and then in triage they asked me why I was back and I told them ! They were not happy but told me the lady would see me so I then waited another 4 hours ! I think she wanted to show me I was wasting her time ! When I got to see her she was rude and condescending and basically told me there was nothing wrong go away and don’t come back.
At this point I was not happy and was now having about 5+ TIAs a day ( not that I knew what they were at that point ) I decided to go private and get an MRI as I was all over the place by now and really struggling. The results of the MRI were not good and my Doctor rang me at home late at night to give me the news. I had Brain Damage after a Stroke and was now having TIA’s and could have another stroke at any time. I went to the Vascular clinic at the Royal the next day and the team were first class the were however very annoyed with the eye hospital for sending me home. The also scanned my Neck in the MRI and they found quite a lot of damage in my neck that could be causing me issues now and in later life (something else to look forward to)
At this point I was glad I was drinking whisky with my friends Matt and Lee because it turns out that was the night I had my Stroke in my Hotel Room alone !!!
I had my neck doppler scanned and it was found my right carotid artery was 90% blocked, and would need surgery asap. They explained how the Camera Procedure had probably pushed my blood pressure up and had dislodged some particles in the artery.
So my Gallstone camera procedure had probably saved my life in a roundabout way !! Better it happen now than to be on holiday in 5 years time have a massive Stroke and Die.
My Gallstone operation was put on the back burner until after I had a Carotid Endarterectomy a procedure to clear out the plaque in my Carotid Artery. The risks to the operation were Stroke or Death. Trust me it’s a scary time, you make sure you have a Will and all the things that need to be in place are in place. I even thought well I have had a happy life so if this is it then its been good.
It was February now and I had been having TIA’s basically from November 2018 to about 4 weeks before the operation the reason they has stopped is because the medication they had put me on stopped blood clots forming in the narrowing in my neck. I was scanned again before the operation and the narrowing was 80% so what probably explained the amount of TIA’s I was having a day.
I was prepped for Surgery on the 13th of Feb 2019 and already to go to theatre after crapping myself all night. The operation was called off because the MRI report had been written up back to front and they needed clarification on what side the brain damage was on. I was back in on the 14th Feb 2019 and the procedure was carried out. I had a funny turn after the operation due to suddenly becoming allergic to codeine but was home soon after to recover.
I was seen by a neurology professor who explained I had been very lucky but even though I look fine on the outside I had sustained some quite serious brain damage that would never heal but in time I would work round it. This was backed up by further tests and I was told it would be about two years before I started to work this all out.
Just as I was recovering from the Surgery my Gallbladder decided to start playing up again and this time I could not take codeine so was prescribed this mad drug that did take the pain away but kept me awake all night !! Gallbladder pain is off the scale and the only way to relive it is to walk and walk until it subsides, the drugs help but only for a while and the pain lasts for up to 13 hours. During this time I had the pleasure of Gallstones coming out of the gallbladder and getting stuck in the bile ducts and this is a whole new level of OUCH.
The NHS would not remove my Gallbladder for some strange reason and I kept getting put on the end of the list. In the end I found out that I needed a letter from my Consultant to allow me to come off my blood thinner and go on to Aspirin for 7 days but they would still not move me up the list. I ended up in A&E a couple of times on Morphine to relieve the pain and they told me people were jumping the waiting list by keep presenting at A&E with pain. However I could not do that due to the medication I was on.
So again I went private and had my Gallbladder out a couple of months back.
Its bliss to now been pain free even if I can’t eat like I used to, I am happy not to have to be in agony at random times any more.
So as you can see it’s been a journey so far and it’s not over yet as far as Stroke recovery. I am really looking forward to 2020 as I see 2020 as a fresh start and want to start to get out again with my camera. I hope to take you on the rest of my recovery journey in 2020 through youtube and this blog. A stroke is quite a shock to the system and is life changing I will explain more on YouTube in 2020.
I would like to thank Jane and Jake for the support this year and all my close friends who have always been at the end of the phone and my Medical Friends who have given me so much great advice without you guys I would have gone nuts.
I would also like to thank the NHS who are over run with people abusing the system so it makes it hard for people who really need it. I have had a few issues with mistakes over the last two years but they are under so much pressure its unreal. The Vascular team at the royal are amazing and a credit to the NHS. The private hospitals are also under strain as they are picking up where the NHS cannot cope.
Also to all you guys that follow my blog and youtube have a great new year and see you in 2020.
I don’t know where to start with this but after leaving a Facebook Group yesterday because the admin were demanding that every post had the camera settings I was left shocked !
They also wanted to know what Lee filter was used !
I did make a comment before I left but I think it was lost in Translation ! The guy was insisting it was not about the light !
I fully understand they most people that are learning to use there camera think they need to know other people’s camera settings and for some reason some Pro’s and some trainers encourage this, and so do lots of groups !
I remember when I was younger I even fell for this myself until I realised it’s all irrelevant!
We are convinced by other people the way to learn is to read up on camera settings so much so we get obsessed with Exiff data !
We then think if we had that camera and that lens that guy uses so we could take photos like him or her !
The brands have taken this to the next level and love all their Ambassadors to share this info.
The Photographer might as well share what they had for breakfast and how they were dressed for all the good it will do us.
If you were to take three photos with the exact same setup at three different times of day using a Photographers setting you would get three different sets of results.
We don’t know what the light was like at the time, what software was used, how it was processed or what effect the Photographer was going for.
When I used to teach Street Photography the most common question I ever got asked was “can you set my camera up for me ?” or “what are your camera settings for Street ?”
When I try and explain that’s not how it works I get the look ! I can hear the cogs ticking ! “He does not want to tell us his secrets !” “He does not want us to be better than him !”
When the truth is I Format my memory card before I go out and shoot in RAW and have my Cameras set on Manual if I am in a Studio and Aperture Priority or Shutter Priority out on the Street and probably Auto ISO ! If I am shooting Landscape it will be Manual with the lowest ISO probably.
Wherever we stand on this planet whatever country we are in, at any given time of day the light and conditions are different and also the effect we want in our camera also comes in to play.
We have to learn to Master the Exposure Triangle there and then and it’s only by going out day after day for years and years can we work out what works for us.
Yes of course you can use the Sunny 16 rule on a Sunny day but that just gets you a shot !
What if you want people with motion blur or want narrow depth of field or you even want to make people disappear from the scene ! What if you want movement in the clouds or silky water !
What if in a Studio you want High Key or Low key ?
Stop obsessing over bloody camera settings and get out and practice ! The more time you spend with a camera in your hand the more you learn.
Photography is about so much more than Exiff Data it’s about Light,Composition, Moment, Amazing Subject and Emotional impact. It’s about you the Photographer and what your vision is. Not what settings Linda Wisdom uses !
You won’t learn this stuff in a week or a month it’s a lifetime of learning !
If you are in a Facebook group that insists on Exiff Data leave the group, go outside and take some photos it will be the best thing you have done for your photography all week.
There is no shortcut trust me, get out with your camera every day or as much as you can and practice practise practise, learn by your mistakes and trial and error. That way you learn a lot faster.
You can read as many books as you want, do as many courses as you want they just give you inspiration. It’s down to you and you alone to teach yourself the Exposure Triangle and learn to speed up that process by daily practise.
Jane always says to me she does not want to learn photography because there is too much to remember ! So very true but with practice it becomes second nature. You can just dial it in and shoot. You don’t become an expert at anything if you sit on your arse and wait for it to come to you, hard work and commitment is the name of the game.
Searching YouTube for those bits of info on camera setting for hours and hours won’t make you a better photographer it just makes you a couch potato !
So get up go out and get practicing ..
When I wrote part one I was interested to have a good look around Social media to see what the response was, and to be honest it was as expected.
Some thought it was great and very true and most of these were people whose work I found on Social Media are Professional or very good photographers in general with some interesting bodies of work.
There were some that thought it was a shouty ranty post that was a load of crap ! Looking at most these peoples work available on Social media it’s technically fine and some of the people even work in Photography for a living but their work has no personality or soul and it’s more for the viewer than the photographer. Some thought I was arrogant and an arse !
Everyone is entitled to think what they like and the fact I am now writing this blog to help people learn to see and move forward I know what I have to say won’t be to everyone’s taste but hopefully the few that do take a few hints and tips on board will be able to lift their work to the next level. I have helped a few people to really achieve great things in their work and sometimes you have to be honest and help them find their way.
Even though I say I have only helped a handful achieve Exhibitions and Books I have probably inspired 1000’s to more forward with their work.
The most interesting thing I noticed was the amount of times people said “who is he to tell us we can’t call ourselves Photographers” Interesting how my blog post was interpreted because that’s not what I said.
Even more interesting was the the fact people were saying ” who is he to tell us we can’t call ourselves Photographers, we are entitled to call ourselves whatever we want” I did laugh at this and then did some more research.
A teacher friend of mine told me that in modern teaching kids are being told they can be anything they want to be and are Entitled to call themselves anything they like.
I think that’s great and as a young boy my Parents encouraged me to play sport and learn to play instruments etc in the hope that I would find something that would interest me they also wanted me to join a choir ! But I was cluless with Music and apart from getting off my face during the Rave Scene and being mad about Psytrance and House Music I was never going to learn an instrument.
I did however Swim for Kent win the British Bench Press in 82.5 Kilo class and competed in the World Powerlifting Championships at 82.5 Kilo class and trust me I trained day 7 days a week to Swim and to lift weights. I don’t think I would have dared to walk in a Gym and said I am a Powerlifter if I was not. I also played in the British Roller Hockey Team in Goal against Spain. I spent hundreds of hours training in all these sports so that I could overachieve.
So if this is the modern world and people are entitled to call themselves anything they want then I am a Chef a Singer and Film Star ! But my advice is don’t buy and of my food buy some ear defenders and dont watch any of my films.
I do think this is sad because what is wrong with learning a craft and waiting a few years before you start calling yourself anything ?
Its quite funny how the Photography industry has been devalued buy all the people that call themselves Photographers ! Imagine people calling themselves Plumbers and Mechanics being let loose in your home or on your car !
My original blog was about just that, you don’t need to call yourself a Photographer, you can of course and you are Entitled to ! But personally I would get a body of work together and get some years under my belt before I called myself anything.
Some people need to take a long good look at their own work and dig deep and consider their own path and development.
I will continue my blog and try and help the people that want to read it to improve their work it’s amazing how most of the Haters do not have a body of work or many images to show for themselves and have the loudest voices ! Do you think this is because they don’t like the idea that anyone is better than them ?
All my blog posts are open to debate and discussion and one thing I do like about WordPress is its relatively Troll Free because most of them cant be arsed to read more than a couple of paragraphs on Twitter or watch a youtube channel.
Photography has always been a hotbed of jealousy and Trolling so I will only answer and debate with people that are genuine.
Have a great week.